My recent blog may have given some wrong impressions. Sometimes I don’t choose the right words. I want to apologize to Cindy for any negative impression people may have derived from my words. It was not my intention.
One of the things that I have to work on is dwelling on the negative. It always seems to take the biggest focus. One of my advisors told me that I needed to arrest those thoughts and focus on the positive. My counselor had me read a book on rewiring your thought patterns. So the negative is on me.
The book talks about recognizing the patterns and rethinking them. It was an interesting read. It is something I am still working on. To that end though, I want to share some positive things about my life with Cindy. Cindy and I have shared many adventures together. Probably the most interesting was our honeymoon cruise.
We were to cruise to Bermuda. We were excited. Unfortunately, it was hurricane season. The island was hit by a hurricane and there was talk of us going, not to Bermuda, but to Boston. Boston?? In the end, the cruise was on. As we drew closer, there were high swells. Cindy had gotten us, what I believe was the owner’s cabin. It was a beautiful suite with a private deck. It should have been a dream adventure, but the swells from the hurricane had the floor falling out from below us. We both ended up with seasickness despite Cindy having Dramamine. I had not taken any as I lived on the water growing up in Rhode Island. We both ended up in the infirmary getting shots. Once we normalized, we were able to settle in. We enjoyed the slot machines and attended a few of the auctions. Dinner was always interesting as the ship was still dealing with the swells, so as it crested one wave and dropped, the screws (propellors) would come out of the water and vibrate everything. The steward was making it his mission in life to get me to eat one of their deserts.
We arrived at King’s Wharf to learn that the dock workers were on strike. The original plan was that our ship would move to Hamilton after a few days. That was not going to happen. The bus workers were on strike also, so transportation was lacking. We were told not to rent the scooters, but I went over and sat in the office until a two-seater became available. It took a little waiting but I got one and we were off. I believe we first headed over to Hamilton. We visited a few shops and then were off to the Crystal Caves. It took a while and we got to go over the smallest drawbridge in the world. Crystal Caves was at the other end of the island. The Caves were fascinating. I had to get over my claustrophobia as you had to descend into a hole, but the stalactites hang from the ceiling of a cave while stalagmites grow from the cave floor, which gave an amazing scene.
On our last day Cindy wanted to go to Horseshoe Bay Beach. The beach itself was a mess due to all the debris. Cindy got in her bathing suit and headed into the surf. The surf was still rough so she often got knocked down by the waves and came away with a bathing suit full of sand. We made the ship just in time to leave for our return home.
Cindy and I have shared many great adventures. I apologize if I came across negative. I owe a lot to her. She was the one who empowered me to become me. So I hope that she will accept my apology.
I need to really work on being more positive. Part of the reason that Cindy was pushing me was so that I could spread my wings and become who I really was. Unfortunately, I got caught up in negative and allowed that to eat at me. As I said, that is on me. Cindy is a wonderful person who cares a lot. I need to work on me more.
My heart to your heart, one heart, one spirit.
That’s a completely stunning picture, Emma. I haven’t been following but it seems there’s a lot of generosity and good will between you and your ex, which is heartening to see. I accidentally deleted a comment you so generously wrote on my site. I came here to say that I’m sorry and please feel free to post it again, time and energy permitting! Thank you 🙂
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